Rosebud

bible
Daryl Jenkins was a pious man.
When he married Melissa, her hymen was still intact, because she’d always insisted on anal. Their love was true and pure.

On their wedding night, Melissa was not pleased. Daryl did none of the things she longed for. No finger poppin’, no anal creampies, and no monster facials; no slapping, calling her degrading names, or treating her like a piece of trash.
Nuthin’.

Just making sweet tender love, missionary style.
Daryl moaned, “oh…yes..be fruitful and multiply”,  while filling her pussy with a very weak load. It was everything he’d hoped it would be. Melissa cried herself to sleep, knowing that her husband couldn’t fuck for shit.

The next day Melissa posted a craigslist ad looking for BBC’s.
Her inbox was stuffed with potentials. Her asshole was stuffed with big brown dicks, so many brown dicks,  that her asshole prolapsed into a rosebud. Disgusting.
I mean, ish.

One day Daryl came home from work to find Melissa on her knees surrounded by all of her new colored friends, her face plastered with gallons of mostly fresh semen, her asshole hanging down to the floor like an old sock.
Daryl almost lost his faith that day.
Almost.

Daryl eventually forgave Melissa.
Melissa eventually gave Daryl AIDS, after she was creampied by a guy who’d done some very gay stuff in college.

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28 comments on “Rosebud

  1. Kris says:

    Not a read to peruse during dinner! 😂

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Red says:

    I agree with the first comment…really wish I hadn’t been eating when I read that! Still made me smile though…

    Liked by 1 person

  3. TradeRoutz livingStyle says:

    Jesus! HILARIOUS!! How the hell did you make this up?? Excellent! bloody funny too

    Liked by 2 people

  4. Michael says:

    This was steamy until the AIDS put a downer on it. The BBC and cuckolding was hot🔥

    Liked by 1 person

  5. *mouth open shaking her head, eyebrows raised *

    Fuckin’ hell!.. I’ve never come across a blog like this. I’m amazed and shocked at your creativity at the same time Lol

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Well, some of these stories made me stop writing, reach for my cigerattes and coffee to read along. It’s 1.00 am London time my most creative time early hours of the morning… so I better get back to it. Ps.. I guessed male as when men write erotic stories (from what I have read), it is all most always VERY explicit. Only once did I read an erotic book, written under a female pen name by a guy and not guess “this is a man’s job” normally I can tell *wink

    Liked by 2 people

    • filthydee123 says:

      Glad you were able to get back to creating! Your description of male vs female erotic stories jibes with what I’ve seen as well. I had simply never thought about it before. Interesting;)

      Like

      • Personally in my humble view, I thin it boils down to men enjoy and are maybe more visual so the description is very explicit, where as women may focus more on the feeling when they create more erotic scenes… I think both styles are great, it is always a good reading experience when you can visualise what’s going on in a story.

        Liked by 1 person

      • filthydee123 says:

        I think you nailed it. I also enjoy bot styles;) I think I’ll try and write one that passes as a female’s writing sometime, for fun.

        Liked by 1 person

  7. anothershortdictator says:

    These are hysterical. They’re kind of anti-fairy tales, where there’s no happy endings, just Aids. 🙂

    Liked by 2 people

    • filthydee123 says:

      Thank you anothershortdictator, glad you enjoyed. You summarized it perfectly. Hope you don’t mind if I use “anti-fairy tales, where there’s no happy endings, just Aids” in the future when asked what I write 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  8. Hilarious read! Thanks for sharing that!

    Oddly enough, Rosebud reminds me of some — a few — of my poems. They aren’t anywhere as “filthy” as Rosebud, but they are humorous efforts to take down piety too.

    The closest I get to a “filthy” poem is, “Sex is Sacred so She Said”. Here’s a link to it, if you’re interested: https://cafephilos.blog/2007/03/21/sex-is-sacred-so-she-said/

    Liked by 1 person

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